some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Farmville is her only friend.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
