ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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