she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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