So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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