I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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