fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
