I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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