love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
