chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
