dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
