I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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