More tranny stories later!
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
