I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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