I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
