$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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