Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
