Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
i dont even know how to be here
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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