she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
You smell like stripper and shame
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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