I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
