i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
COCAINE IS GR8
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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