How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
