he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize