Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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