Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
she told me i tasted like america
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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