So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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