She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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