And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
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