i don't plan on having that self control this summer
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
