New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
