bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
splinters make it hard to masturbate
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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