I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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