you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
