im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize