If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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