We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
