I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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