I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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