it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
