No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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