so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize