My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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