Sry I called you an 8
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize