And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize