ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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