ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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