Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
