I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Naked. naked and bneed help.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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