you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
