So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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