end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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